


Unnamed

by curlysupergirl



Category: Adam Lambert (Musician)
Genre: Altered Mental States, Depression, M/M, Mental Health Issues
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-01-01
Updated: 2012-01-01
Packaged: 2017-10-28 16:59:51
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 352
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/310045
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/curlysupergirl/pseuds/curlysupergirl
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Adam's depressed. Wait, no, is it depression? He doesn't know.... in fact, he doesn't know anything... why?</p>
            </blockquote>





	Unnamed

I need to focus on writing my new song. Hell, I just need to get out of bed. Am I even in bed? Where am I? Everything seems fuzzy. No, not fuzzy just… pressured. So much pressure. It hurts. But everything is clear. Too clear. Too sharp. The edges are too sharp. Help. Who can help? No one is here. Wait, no, there are people. Right there. Why aren’t they helping me? Where is Sauli? He promised never to leave me. Why can’t they see I am in pain? Help. Why aren’t they answering? No, they are walking away. Fading. No, I am fading. Why don’t they see me? Am I here at all? Was I ever here? What is wrong with me? Why can’t I string my thoughts….. together? Why….. thoughts…. hurt….

f

      a

d

  e……………

 

 **Unnamed**

 

I’m lost in my thoughts.

Sitting here, I’m alone.

Guilt racks my trembling frame,

A feeling I won’t condone.

 

I can’t stand to be around people.

I can’t stand to be alone.

So absorbed by my own little world,

I barely hear the ringing of the phone.

 

But it’s enough to bring me back

And notice that I’m tired and shivering.

I don’t want to cry. I can’t right now.

But against my wishes, my lip starts quivering.

 

It’s killing me now.

I can’t tell what I’m feeling.

I’m thinking too hard.

It’s leaving me reeling.

 

I guess I’ll never know.

Maybe one day it will hit me.

But I can’t just let it go.

I can’t seem to fall asleep.

 

Plaguing my mind,

The feeling falls into a hole.

The only thing that remains

Of my long tortured soul.

 

It’s been so long,

Since I’ve been allowed to breathe.

My self-imposed chains,

Kept my gasps restricted inside me.

 

Drink in hand.

Head pounding and reeling.

I don’t like this effect,

I don’t know what I’m feeling.

 

The emptiness fills me.

An odd paradox.

My chest expands with my breaths,

Pushing on its locks.

 

The name of this sensation

Slips around in my mind.

It continues to evade me.

Unnamed, one of a kind.

 

 

 

 


End file.
